Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Modern Day Curses...

"You will forget your all that you have learnt when you most need it" (Karna)

"You will die of the greivance of being away from your son" (Dasharatha)

"You will die in the next seven days after being bitten by the Takshaka Snake" (Parikshit)

"You will die at the attempt of consummation" (Pandu)

"You will be turned into a stone and will regain your normal form only after being touched by the holy feet of the form of Vishnu" (Ahalya)

"You will be born as a human being for the crime that you have committed" (Bhishma)

... are all examples of famous curses received by famous people as per our Hindu Mythology.

Curses were part and parcel of our Hindu Mythology and they were an interesting part in our epics and related stories. A curse in the epic was like a drama that is created just before the interval in a movie and the redemption from that curse would be like the climax of the movie. In essesnce, curses added color and variety and lot of other adjectives to the story.

As per Iyer Education's research finding, it is the lack of curse's in today's life is what is making life so dull (lets just assume that our lives are dull here) and taking life to the dogs... And by curse we are not talking about the daily curses that we receive from our mothers, fathers, wives, husbands et al. Those are just uttered... they arent MEANT... By curse we mean the formal types of curses that sadhus and rishis used to utter out with a palmful of water... Had those been there in today's life, we would be having a great and colorful life...

Now that we have said that curse's dont exist today, partially because we dont have qualified cursors (not the ones that blink on your screen) and secondly people wont even believe when they are cursed... given the kind of thoughts that people are moving away from traditional to more modern and technically advanced thoughts... So we wonder how curses would have evolved with time had they still been existing today... And we do that with situations where these sages could curse people... So here's a probable list of curse's you'd get to hear if curses did exist today.

Sage: I curse you that you... er.. er..
Offender: Any problems?
S: Er... What is your profession?
O: *proudly* Software Engineer
S: I curse you that your project will always to have scope creeps and it'd never get past the UAT stage... *sprinkles water using barber wala sprinkler*

S: What is your name?
O: Dr Dinanath Dhurandhar Dabbawaala...
S: *he he no need to ask profession at all*
S: I curse you that there would be a cemetry right next to your dispensary you will function as its ancillary unit... *sprinkles water with the Dr's syringe*

O: I am an accountant
S: I curse that your P&L and Balance sheet will never tally in any financial year and the auditor wont spare you... and your dream to become a CA will always remain a dream... *sprinkles water using fountain pen*

O: I am an MBA
S: I curse that you will forget all the jargons that you learnt at Wharton whenever you need them the most... *sprinkles water using hand shower*

O: College Student...
S: I curse that you will attend all the lectures and get an award for the student with the most attendance *sprinkles water from water cooler*

S: I curse that your comments section will always be empty and that you'd suffer from a block whenever you'd want to write something *sprinkles some e-H2O"

O: Westerner
S: I curse that you wont see mangoes and elephants in india *throws a piece of tissue paper* (those guys dont use water in anycase)

... alright alright... this list has come to an end.... let us type the magic word you've been dying to read...



Ajith said...

O: College Student...
S: I curse that you will attend all the lectures and get an award for the student with the most attendance *sprinkles water from water cooler*
That would be the toughest one.. Plus , maybe "U'll study throughout in a guy's only class :) "

Bharath Hemachandran said...


Loved the college student curse.

Hari said...

Iyer guruji think abt the vardaans that our mythological dudes get...ejjample...jarasand who had two mothers and they shared the same fruit hence he was born in two seperate parts now think if they would have had Jackfruit(Phanas) (Chakkai pazayam... as we call it)

Girish said...

Last curse ..too good :)

Sense said...

O: I'm an Iyer
S: i curse you that you will be banished to a land with no thair saadam and where there shall be no food without meat.

Iyer Education said...

@ajith, you just made the curse a little more tougher to go thru

@bharath, thangew

@hari, now that you have mentioned vardaans... i guess i need a new post for it altogether... thangew for the idea

@girish, thangew vairy much

@sense, how could i miss that one... thanks a ton for filling in :)

venus said...

westerner: throw a piece of tissue paper..
haa haa that was very funny :)

Fleiger said...

Now I know why almost all my comment fields are barren as arctic circle...

guruji, is shaap se bachne ke liye kuch upay to hoga...

RustyNeurons said...

Stumbled upon your blog - genuine laughter material!

Nariyal Chutney said...

It is so true that it is the lack of curse's in today's life is what is making life so dull .Where is this Guruji ? Can you give us a contact so that I can get a curse of similar kind :) . LOL

Kusum said...

I never thought customisation could reach these heights or er lows, is it?

sp said...

I liked the curse for the MBA grad. :-)