Friday, October 27, 2006

Where art thou, oh spam commenters?

Ever since we came to know about this technology called “Word Verification” in Blogging parlance, we are missing something. Something that was so integral to this blog. Something / someone that made look like this blog was a much popular one with double digit comments on each and every post. We are terribly and immensely missing the more popular variety of spam commenters.

We cannot even begin to express out profound feelings for every variety of them. We refrain from doing that because if we try and get to that then we’d cry and we’d make others also cry so much so that Nirupa Roy’s record for tear shedding would be broken in an instant. So as an ode to her we refrain from discussing our emotions and only scope this topic up to the level of discussing the various types of spam commenters. So here’s our ode to the unsung heroes of this blog. The people who filled in the comments section of this blog and made sure that none of the posts had any empty comments.

Cash Day Loaners: These guys come up with excellent schemes that would put the banks around here to shame. Not even CITI or HDFC or HSBC can come up with such schemes. They come up with genius comments like this “Great blog. nice piece of information on it. Taken some help from it in creating my own cash loans blog. Do visit if you need anything.” Now we have a post on KBC and they cash (no pun intended) on it by offering me cash loans. Saala these banks don’t even offer me a paisa under the assumption that we would convert all of them into NPA’s. And these noble souls are ready to give me cash even without knowing me. And NO DOCUMENTATION REQUIRED… what say?

Payday Advance Loaners: These set of people for us sound like our ‘kaamwaali bai’ who keeps asking for advances much in advance of her pay day. These guys come to me with decent (not filthy or dirty) advances. If at all there was an Anti Blank Noise Project then we would put these guys first for making decent advances like “I have bookmarked you for the excellent piece of work that you have put on. I will like your presence at my site on Quick payday advances and see if that can be a help”. Look how they appreciate your work. And we’d need them someday when we use up all our money to have daroo instead of paying our kids’ fees. That day, we’d surely get back to them for some advances to pay the liabilities of school fees.

Student Loaners: On second thoughts, we’d come here asking for loans for our kids’s education. These guys seem to be more dedicated at providing loans for education than the earlier one. And their prospectus reads “I have bookmarked you for the excellent piece of work that you have put on. I will like your presence at my site on student loans and see if that can be a help”. Now have we read that somewhere? Do you also, like us, think that they have copied their material from other prospectuses? We’ll conduct a detailed investigation on that sometime later.

Auto Loaners: The next time we want to buy a vehicle we sure know who to catch hold of. These people. And with the kind of international background and international connection we might as well be eligible for something like a Ferrari or Lamborghini or even Rolls Royce for that matter. These guys are good at relationships and keep sending sweet messages like “hey what a nice site. Your blog is great .regards. Auto loans”. Now they make sure that they don’t get too sweet either. Diabetes is not good naa… that’s why. Rolls Royce… Here we come to own you.

Did anyone notice something common amongst the above kind of commenters. All of them are loaners. All of them have money to spend and enough time to spare to keep commenting on our blogs. These people are like gems (not Cadbury’s wala re). We promise to have a healthy friendship will all of those and we are sure we will need them someday or the other and on that day, these guys will help me out.

Miss you guys a lot… See you around some other time...

Now we end this post with a social service message to all the readers of this blog (1 to be precise… and that figure includes us). We have just got news that there is this blogger (read spam commenter) who’s found a break to the word verification and has started spamming even on blogs with word verification turned on. Some smart bugger we say. Please watch out for him, and don’t come back to us stating that we didn’t warn you beforehand.



HP said...

Aah...I was reading the post ever so carefully and was pleased to find my name not being included in the spammers list...

I assume those spam comments about medicines for you know what and all those spam comments concerning with the thing that Indians dont do have not been included in this blog for this is a family blog :-)

btw, Happy Weekend..Missed wishing you Diwali, so :-)


Anonymous said...

I miss all those loaners... I feel like I am not solvent anymore ;)

And spammers are part and parcel of online life, where would we be without all those people willing to spend money on us? And providing us (non-needed) medical help...

You forgot one public service type of spammer. One who helps you identify "the great upcoming" stocks and shares... And all these people have one more thing in common. They always like your posts. :(


Yest i got one asking if the ppl who visitmy blog want dope??? Now tht was no loan....They would hack into everything...Just ignore them!

n do u think they need documentation from u to give u loan? They r talking about Rs.1 re....Wo to milega tere ko!

Kusum Rohra said...

* sobbing hysterically * I never get spam med with comments :(

No one loans me money or diamonds !!

Cloudy said...

Hahaha! Have you seen the curt one that goes "Visit my site and see the advertisement carefully"? I kid you not. And on TCP we have an old friend whom we fondly call "Dear Sally"... come to think of it, she hasn't been around laterly...hmmmm...

iyer education said...

@HP, all those "unspeakable" spams come to us on our email id. These ones just send me loans. Happy weekend for the next weekend to you too ;)

@Fleiger, he he... i think the market type commenter found this blog to be a little too much downmarket to even come around here ;)

@Scribz, your blog surely doesnt sound like a den... dope is to put to sleep... your blog is to WAKEUP... sue that guy... make some money out of it and send me some ;)

@Kusum Rohra, CREDIBILITY is the word my dear... cry not ;)

@Cloudy, Dear Sally, as in wives' younger sister? Oh you get the drift of the state of mind that i am currently in ;)