Friday, September 08, 2006

Hope...

The doorbell rang… A slightly elder man walked inside. He held a bag right up close to his armpits. He walked in to the room where the elderly couple was waiting for him eagerly since morning. Getting an appointment with him was always a difficult task. But today was different… It felt like god himself walked in with all the solution to their problems in the bag in his armpit…

The elder man had been a frequent visitor in this house for the last 8 years. So he was very well known to the couple. His frequency would differ every time, sometime in weeks, sometime in months and sometimes he would come in between years. This time around he walked in almost after a month. He took a seat right opposite the elderly couple. He laid the bag down.

A girl served him with water and coffee and walked away, the same girl who opened the door. The elderly gentleman had the water and coffee and took out papers from the bag under and spread them on the table.

All three of them, started scrutinizing the papers that were laid on the table, one after another. The visitor was reading out things to the elderly couple from the paper and the elderly couple was listening intently, as if someone was giving them a discourse on attaining MOKSHA. The visitor took his own sweet little time in analyzing each of the piece of papers and made sure that all the nitty-gritty’s explained to the anxious elderly couple.

One paper followed another and the elderly couple’s faces grew sadder with every passing paper. But yet, they held their hopes and waited for THAT piece of paper that could make them happy again. Something that they never imagined they could be, for the last eight years. And then, the visitor was holding the last piece of hope for the elderly couple. All of the anxiousness and eagerness was clearly evident on the couple’s faces, as if this was the ray of light in a dark 8 year tunnel.

After the last piece of paper was put down, that ray of hope turned into darkness again. The last chance of happiness eluded them, at least for this day. Things became obscure again. Just like they were before the arrival of the visitor. The visitor consoled them and as a thoroughbred professional, charged his fees to this couple and took their leave with a promise to be back with some more papers.

The girl who was watching all of this from the kitchen felt a stream of tears rolling down her cheeks and she wondered why her KUNDLI never matched any guy’s for the last 8 years and would a day ever come when it would?

And the elderly couple and their daughter lived in the hope of a day when it would match…

PS: We are just trying our hands on narration/story telling. Plijj to give us feedback on the same.

adios…

12 comments:

Cloudy said...

First again!
Since you ask, here's my take - I like the twist in the tail, but too serious for me.... and I visit Iyerospace for your unique brand of humour, which you have mercilessly shut out here... but still, as I said, I like the twist :)

Tin Tin said...

uhhhhhh.. dont try any more hands please. try your head.. what comes outta there is usually better - like all your previous posts. But yeah.. I can understand that poem in ur prev blog prob kicked off the somber mood :p.. but somber is for eating with rice!

Kautilya said...

The scene put up does not sound unfamiliar dude...

some wait 4 8 years some for 6, some for 4, some for 2, some lucky ones.. never have 2 wait!

but... all have 2 wait for their turn! an the longer it is.. the agonizing it gets...

Cuckoo said...

Hmm.. very serious stuff but very true also. Very familiar scenario in Indian families. Good attempt!! If it was only an attempt ;)
And yeah, I liked the twist as well :)

LOL@but somber is for eating with rice!

IdeaSmith said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
IdeaSmith said...

Me like it. Methinx yous shows great potential. But me always thought so. Besides, talent grows with diversification...am glad you're trying your hand at something more than humour.

silverine said...

"The girl who was watching all of this from the kitchen felt a stream of tears rolling down her cheeks and she wondered why her KUNDLI never matched any guy’s for the last 8 years and would a day ever come when it would?

And the elderly gentleman, the thoroughbred professional that he is, walked out crumpling the fake Kundli of the nth perfect match he had bought. He was a businessman you see.
"

Pleej to excuse and not give me an imposition, I have a twisted brain you see and that is what I thought would happen :(

:p

HP said...

@Iyer,

Nice attempt!!
Would love to see more of this...

Cheers,
HP

iyer education said...

@cloudy, point taken... and unique BRAND(y) of humour... i likes that line...

@tin tin, LOL at somber and rice... naah poems dont bring along sambar mood... not even thair mood for that matter

@kautilya, i do agree... but i dont accept the fact of stars matching... i believe matching is upto the individual and not the stars

@cuckoo, i swear it was just an attempt and nothing else... and there was nothing else in the story other than the twist ;)

@idea, potential... u really think we have that... thengew vairy much :)

@silverine... AWESOME is the only word that we can relate-to to your ending of the story... ZIMBLY AWESOME

@HP, we will try and twist our demented mind to try and churn out more of these :)

Sanjay said...

Sorry sar am not understanding. Is the guy paid for getting papers or matches? You need both to light the fire.

err...where is the twist?

Akshay said...

The narration is very nice... but, there is no *Iyer education* here.. as Cloudy said, it's the humour that's the best part of this site. Wud love you guys to go back to that here.. (and probably start a more sombar site for the rest...)

iyer education said...

@sanjay, papers, lights, matches... arey baba series is going to starting from tomorrow no... why are you predicting every thing in the past wonly :P